Thursday, March 17, 2005

 

Green and bear it

The Sligo-born Father O'Morrison's reputation for castigating the Brits from the pulpit was legendary. However, the congregation in his new parish of Boston, Mass., tired of his lambasting the Brits for the horrors they had inflicted upon the Irish for generations.
Ultimately, the Archbishop opted to send the good father to a small hamlet in the far reaches of Tennessee where, His Grace said, "The folks know nothing of England and care less. So knock off the Brit bashing and you'll better serve Holy Mother Church."
Several weeks later, when Father O'Morrison stood at the pulpit to deliver his first sermon to his new congregation, the local bishop, who knew of O'Morrison's reputation, was in attendance to check up on him.
"My dear brethren," Father O'Morrison began, "this morning I'd like to talk about The Last Supper."
Not bad, though the bishop. Safe enough ground.
"Now, the lesson to be learned from The Last Supper, where Christ knew He'd been betrayed, is that the sin of betrayal is the worst sin of all. A sin never forgiven by God or man," thundered Father O'Morrison.
Fair enough, thought the bishop.
"Christ looked around at His apostles. 'Was it you, Peter,' He asked, 'who betrayed me?' 'Not I, my Lord,' answered Peter.
"'Was it you, John?' 'Not I, my Lord.'
"Christ asked each of them in turn and finally came to Judas, who was sitting at the end of the table, his head bowed. 'Was it you, Judas, who betrayed me?' asked Christ, and Judas responded, 'Wot? Me? Blimey! Not on yer bloody life, Mi'lud.'"

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